I Am, Who?

To what can I tribute myself to be? Finding that I have much trouble realizing such an insight after losing even a simple piece no long lived, yet still gone or adjusted in some way. Most often who I am goes hand in hand with what I do or who I associate with, once I have to adjust what I am able to do I find myself trying to understand what I shall do in place of what I'm no longer able. Losing a friend, a member of family, or even an aquiantence I am left to see who I was is no longer the same.

Often I know many to see themselves as what they do, by work or acts, but lost in the mix, I see myself as more than a series of acts, and know better than to define myself by a job, especially as I have held so many different positions and titles. So, I'm left to think, I am, who?

With belief in someone greater, beyond comprehension or self, it is my desire not to become someone I am not. Though, I sometimes want to be a whole different individual all together, I understanding I am the way I am because I'm somebody that needs to be in the necessary time I have been alloted. Leaving the designation to another leaves me to find out who it is and how to implement myself in the best manner. Faulty as it may be, single concept never ceases to gain hold, yet I still fight the notion as it is not what I wish to agree upon and invoke within myself or my time. Yet even so I remember a friend giving me intentional wisdom, that even that which I want may still happen once I start along and follow who I was made to be.

So it is as it always has been that I shall impart myself and whole being to become that which I am meant to be. Even as I become lost or without sight or reason for hope I take the step blindly and hopeful in the fact if it should be my last it was by means greater than I, if there is a step forth then it is a step in a direction better than where I am now. I may step, I may climb, I may crawl, I may jump, but I will continue for I know nothing of being still especially when lost or searching.